Shandice

I never remember to update this thing except once every two to three months. Hopefully i will be able to get more into the habbit. So my life is weird right now and I feel like I'm very unsettled. I don't know if I want to be a police officer yet I can't see myself in anything else except full time Army. It hard because I really believe in what I do with it but full time is not an option right now except getting deployed. It funny though how when talk about loving my job everyone thinks that means I love to "blow shit up." Its so not what I do and not many people know what I do even in the Army. I'm in one of those jobs where if you hear about us we are not doing our job. So I tried to write down what I do and this is what I came up with

Become embedded in foreign culture and become familiar with all aspects to ensure proper communication and interaction between the military and civilians of foreign countries

Have ability to estimate, plan, coordinate, advise, supervise, ensure, and resettle any displaced persons, refugees, evacuees, stateless persons, and war victims.

Operate in teams in support of both conventional and special operations

Identify critical needs of local citizens in combat or crisis situations, such as medical needs, city reconstruction, emotional needs, and finding organizations to help aid civilians.

Locate civil resources to support military operations, mitigate non-combatant injury or incident, minimize civilian interference with military operations, facilitate humanitarian assistance activities, and establish and maintain communication with civilian aid agencies and organizations.

Work in small teams with host-nation officials or foreign militaries on programs designed to strengthen democratic institutions, increase stability, deter conflict or relieve human suffering.

So in a nut shell I am the Peace Corps of the Army. I love it and I am looking forward to helping people in other countries. If I do get deployed within the next year I could go to Afghanistan, Iraq, Africa, Tailand, several places in Europe, and some other asian countries. I like to help people especially on the world side. I wish I could find something similar to this but in the United States. I think my group could do a lot of good here but for some reason we haven't started a group to work on internal conflict and problems. Maybe a could write the National Guard and try to start a group in that so they can help state side. hum that would be cool. We could set up medical help stations, work on the gang population, and help with natural disasters we are seeing all over the US right now. Maybe one day.

Here is another tangent. Speaking of the weather, I think the world is going crazy!!! I think we are finally seeing the start of what global warming has done and I think it will only get warmer and the storms are only going to get worse. Our country really needs to come up with a plan to stop global warming at this rate! Wow, since I've graduated college I'm really doing more and thinking more democratically... who would have thought

So I am sitting here at work and doind my homework, this is a great thing. Never at Target would I get paid this well to sit an do homework, study, and play on the internet. I am so excited to graduate and work here enjoying reading which I have not done in years for persoanl purposes. Other than that, heathyr and I are doing quite well.

I remember waking up one morning on a normal Thursday over spring break, wondering the usual, what I was going to do and who I wanted to call to hang out with. The phone rang and on the other line my English teacher was crying.

I never understood until that day how easily your life could change and how much someone did not know about a friend's life. She told me that my good friend, a person whom I had shared classes with for two years was dead. How can a person who seemed so loving and happy be dead? The first thing I said was "How did it happen - was he in a car accident." That was the first thing that came to my mind, I guess I would never have thought that William Smith could have anything painful or bad in his life that would make me think differently. When my teacher told me that he killed himself, my heart tore apart because not even a day ago we had planned on getting together for a movie.

The day before his funeral the police wrote a report on their findings. When I read those words I can remember crying and sobbing soo hard that I could not catch my breathe. Over the past year, his friends and him ended their friendships because of minor differences. After about a month they started to write hate mail to him and even created a web page (similar to the one that was created recently) to make fun of him. This seemed hateful but I never could imagine the end result in such cruelty. William Smith did not know how to deal with this and instead of going to a friend, which at the time he probably thought he no longer had, he put a revolver to his head and ended his life. The bullet went through his temple and out the back of his head. If he would have put the gun a .5 of an inch either way he would have been killed instantly, however he did not and it took a long and painful 45 minutes to die.

The only funny thing that I can pull from this true life story is that the "friends" that wrote those hateful words later on admitted it was only a joke and that they had never meant for that to happen.
People do not understand what they do and how much their action hurt others.

I have said I wanted to stay out of the present drama that has seemed to sprout out of control but I can no longer keep my mouth shut. I promised myself a long time ago that I did not want to be a part of anything that could result in someone's unhappiness or something even worse. I know all of you seem to hate Kaleb right now but you all need to think about if what you are doing is appropriate. He may not be the friend you all seek out so why not just leave it at that. Vengeance isn't something that is easy and not thought about, you have all hurt him more with your one action than he could have done his entire friendship with you.

Kaleb has said and done things that I do not agree with but how is it my right to judge him? In the group everyone has done something that I do not agree with but I will not stoop down to make them hurt because I know how it is to not be liked and I know how much it hurt me when people dropped my friendship becasue of who I was.

This will be my last post in LiveJournal and many of you may actually be happy about that. I will not be a part of this, my last post stated that I was on neutral terms but now I am non-existant. I know who my friends are and what friends I no longer want in my life.

I apologize for the drama, I apologize if people are pointing fingers at my faults. I will not change, and because I lived through this hurtful time of losing someone I care about, I know what I am doing is right in my heart. Good luck to everyone, and may all of you live your life the way you chose. Thanks for the memories.

this journal is friends only, sorry. add me if you want to read it.

so i made this journal for shandice and she hasn't posted yet or changed the pasword, so i am making here first entry! (this is ryan by the way) anyway, i was just bored and being goofy, so i'll go now... :o)